Toronto Recycling, That’s What She Said, and World Theatre Day
Nappoholics Anonymous is a weekly column featuring twelve random thoughts by actor Tony Nappo. Some are funny, some are poignant, some bother him, and some make him weep from sadness while others make him weep for joy. Here are his thoughts: unfiltered, uncensored, and only occasionally unsafe for work.
1. Apparently Toronto cannot recycle black plastic containers because our recycling machines can’t see black. Maybe we should just get the metro police force do it.
2. The strongest argument I can see for Trump potentially winning a second term is that Santa Clarita Diet got picked up for a second season. We are living in what will undoubtedly be looked back on, for centuries, as the Stupid Age.
3. The scariest revelation that I may have had in my entire adult life. Rob was the smarter Ford brother.
4. The Jesus Christ Superstar Live was pretty good except John Legend as Jesus looked like a cute kid who can’t act at all wearing his Star Wars pyjamas wandering around the stage and crooning like Sinatra all night.
5. Every single Beck song sounds better if you sing it with a Cheech Marin voice. It just does.
6. I know that this jaggoff likes to name things after himself but A WHOLE MONTH just seems like hubris.
7. Whenever someone tries to be funny using “That’s what she said,” I now immediately always say, “Hashtag I believe her.” It doesn’t always make sense but it lets people know where I stand.
8. Top 5 Tragically Hip Ontario Provincial Election Promises Songs
5- So Hard. Wynne, Bye.
4- Blowing My Dough
3- Locked in the Trunk of Doug Ford’s Car
2- Nifty Dental Caps
1- In Debt for a Century
9. Beat that, Mansbridge!!!
10. One term I can’t stand hearing younger actors use is “your hit.” Essentially, it doesn’t mean much more than how you come across, what you look and sound like. It doesn’t have anything to do with acting. Nothing. I think it bugs me because it gets shoved down the throats of young actors all the time when they are starting out and it’s a thing that actors can get seriously hung up on. I mean, it’s fine for agents or casting people to think that way—it’s their job to assess you from the outside and decide what roles you will more likely land over other roles—but I don’t think it’s a real valuable place for actors to put their focus. It’s reductive. Especially in this present climate of inclusive and diverse casting. Anyone can play any role. That doesn’t mean they will. But, in theory, they can. And, of course, it’s important to know who you are because your “person” is your entire instrument, but it’s not like you can change most of it in any significant way. Not the stuff people mean when they use that term, anyway. Just do the work. Get very good at doing the work. Fuck that hit shit.
11. Serah Small breastfeeds her child in the dressing room in Alberta, and the internet throws her a parade. Yet when I do it everyone calls me a weirdo and keeps asking where I got the baby from and who it belongs to. Talk about a double standard.
12. I spent World Theatre Day watching TV. I wanted to get a sense of what it’s like to avoid all the glamour and elitism of Toronto theatre and live like a “regular Joe” for just one day.
Tony Nappo
Tony is Italian, he’s from Scarborough, he’s an actor, he’s a father, he’s a really good house painter, and he doesn’t believe that most things matter, ultimately, at all.
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Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
Paintings, Pornos, and Broken Countries
Every single fucking time there is a mass shooting, we all give the speeches, and we all share the memes (to each other, who are all mostly already in agreement), but nothing changes.
Gottfried, Strays, and Easter Eggs
Dogs rarely have a hidden agenda when they meet people or other dogs: they're either wagging that shit or they aren’t.
Slapping People, ACTRA Meetings, and Dog Shit
At one point, I was sleeping with so many actresses that they used to just hold ACTRA meetings in my bedroom.
Birthdays, Cranes, and Judd Apatow
If the Freedom Convoy has answered one question for every Canadian, I think it's this: whatever happened to that dumb kid in my class?
Scorsese, Dentists, and Dying Alone
If waving a Fuck Trudeau flag is a legit way to get a meeting with him, I’m gonna start waving my Fuck Scorsese flag wherever I go and keep my fingers crossed.
Truckers, Porndle, and Bad Boys
In these newly woke times in the entertainment industry, it’s slightly amazing to me that nobody has protested the fact that Denzel Washington isn’t actually Scottish yet.
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